Most of us tend to see love through rose-tinted glasses when we are younger because our perception comes from the overdose of perfection we find in traditional rom coms. You know, over-the-top declarations of love, a happily-ever-after, and lots of intimacy. Relationships are far from “perfect” because humans aren’t. And if something is sticking 100/100 to the rule, can it even feel organic or real?
Of course, you can make your relationship the way you want it to be. It can be cheesy if you and your partner are on board with the parmesan pairing! Or if you love it to be a mix of witty banter, leg-pulling and beer chugging, then be it. Having said that, apart from everything that makes you want to throw your arms around your bae and plant kisses on their face, there are things that may make you want to throw things at them (that’s just a sentiment, please don’t do it!)
Relationships are about morning breaths, messed-up hair, worn-out tees, and everything that you are. It’s about making mistakes, showing your dark side, your scars and broken pieces to the one you love, and knowing they will love you anyway. In relationships, you should have the freedom to be imperfect, because that is what is truly being free—and plus point, it brings you closer!
Here’s how the freedom to be imperfect brings you closer as a couple.
1) You’re not afraid to be completely honest with them
Most of us would say that as teens we have lied to our families at some point. We’ve made memories, good choices and bad choices, but many of us felt that we couldn’t share it with our parents because they may judge us or get overprotective. Some of us have to cough up little lies, even today, to be able to follow our choices and make mistakes, and learn from them.
Similarly, when we have romantic relationships, it gets hard to be honest sometimes because we fear the reaction may not be a good one. Having said that, a relationship wherein you can make mistakes and not be judged encourages open communication. Maybe you are dealing with your insecure attachment style. POV: They don’t judge you but reassure you with love!
2) You feel loved for who you are
I have my pros and cons! I am the most caring person you will date but I also come with an undying need for attention. Someone else may be very practical and highly intelligent but lacks good communication skills. And all of us end up messing things up sometimes, with whatever we lack. But that doesn’t define us. And having someone who loves us the way we are, with our flaws, with the mistakes we make and looks at us like we are the best thing that happened to them—that, my friend, is a real tear-jerker material!
3) Your relationship becomes a safe space
When you are not judged for your flaws and mistakes, your partner becomes your best friend too. You know if you are in a situation that is embarrassing, you can still seek their advice or at least get it off your chest by sharing it with them. Human emotions are complicated and sometimes, we end up behaving in a way we shouldn’t. But it’s amazing to be able to show your vulnerable side and talk about what really happened, instead of finding the first best-sounding excuse for your behaviour. You know your partner will understand, give you honest support and never withdraw love from you for that.
4) Little fights keep the excitement going
Long-lasting relationships aren’t built by people with one foot out of the door. Relationships require staying put, of course not in an abusive one. But it means accepting your partner’s strengths and weaknesses. Knowing that not every day can be lovey-dovey, that fights may range from little annoyances to full-blown war reconstructions. It is knowing not every day there are going to be topics of conversation, not every problem you communicate to your partner may get resolved and it just won’t be “perfect”. But that’s what makes every relationship unique and more human.
5) It makes you know each other better
If we put forward only our best side and not our quirks or flaws, they will never know the true us. Freedom to be imperfect in your relationship allows you to know each other in and out, without cover-ups or the need to pretend.