When it comes to our family or spouse, the default setting in our brain is to trust them to have our best interest in mind. I am not saying you should not trust the people in your life, but preserving your financial security doesn’t hurt. Financial abuse is not uncommon and many people experience it, without ever knowing they are victims of abuse.
Domestic violence has plagued our society for ages, and often forms of non-physical abuse get overlooked because there are no scars to show. But the damage an abusive relationship causes to your life can leave horrendous scars on your mind, heart and your financial independence.
In 2015, according to a survey, around 80 per cent of women in India were found to be financially illiterate. Things have been evolving now and women are taking more control of their finances.
Financial independence is empowering and helps women stand up for themselves. It is important to know if you’re being financially abused because it strips you of your rights and the ability to protect yourself.
Here are signs you are being financially abused.
Sabotaging your employment
There are many women who say that their spouses or families don’t “allow” them to work. This means that they are establishing an unequal power dynamic, putting you in a place where you have to seek their permission to be financially independent. It means they are restricting you from having your own money, thus putting you in a position wherein you are highly dependent on them to sustain.
Employment sabotage also includes inhibiting your career growth by creating situations that disable you from performing. Say there is an important project that would help you escalate in your career and your spouse conveniently refuses to give you the necessary support for it. It also involves creating a conflict and pressure right before an interview or a presentation that impacts your mental bandwidth to perform.
Ruining your personal financial health
In this case, they will intentionally destroy your financial resources or credit. They’ll use your money without your knowledge, take a loan or credit under your name, refuse to pay bills or their share, and even invest your money without your permission. If they are sabotaging your financial health and credit, it is a form of financial abuse.
Not including you in financial decisions
This often happens when the abuser says they’d like to “take care” of all your finances to help you. They act like they are doing you a favour by taking the burden off your shoulder. Instead of making you aware of your financial investments and decisions, they act like your bank account is their own little fund that they can manipulate to their liking. If you have earned that money, you should know how it is being used, to say the least.
They control you in exchange for money
If they are earning and you are not, for some reason, they ensure that they give you financial support only in exchange for your submission to their authority. The control can be sexual or non-sexual. Either way, it is more about power. They may even limit your access to things that you didn’t pay for.
How to protect yourself from financial abuse:
1) Educate yourself about personal finance.
2) Hire a financial advisor to manage your investment portfolio.
3) Ensure you have your own money, that you manage yourself.
4) Demarcate your financial boundaries, especially if you are earning. For example, if you are married, you can keep a mutual account for shared household expenses, while maintaining a personal account as well to secure your own stability.
Also Read: Female Finance Influencers You Should Follow On Instagram