How To Manage Stress As A Gen S Mom With Young Children And Ageing Parents

When it comes to childcare, whether we have children of our own or not, as grownups, we can all agree that it is no easy task. The kind of patience it demands, the energy, time and smart decisions you have to make, can feel daunting to many. On top of it, parenthood comes with financial responsibilities. However, when it comes to gen S or sandwich generation moms, they also have their ageing parents to look after too.

For those who are uninitiated on the term, sandwich generation moms are those mothers who have growing children and ageing parents. They often feel like a candle burning from both ends because of having so much to do for the generation before and after them.

The pandemic made the sandwich generation feel the pinch even more, as a lot of financial and domestic responsibilities fell on them.

According to the American Psychological Association, mothers in the sandwich generation feel much more stress than those in any other age group. They feel “overextended” and they struggle with managing their stress efficiently. In fact, 83 per cent of mothers say that their partner, children and families often contribute to major stress in their lives as they struggle to balance it all while trying to take care of themselves too.

Here are ways you can manage your stress as a gen S mom.

1) Identify what stresses you

While having so many responsibilities can be overwhelming for many, you should identify which aspects stress you the most. You can create a list in order of those that cause you the most to the least stress. You can manage your triggers much better after you recognise them.

2) Keep a mood journal

Journaling helps manage your stress, moods, and emotions. Identify what something makes you feel exactly. Does it make you feel panic, anxiety, frustration or do you get feelings of exhaustion, helplessness, etc? Ruchi Shah, a licensed Dance Movement Therapy professional and therapist says, “The first step is being aware of your feelings and how they are manifesting in your body. The second step is acceptance and building tolerance towards what you are feeling. When you accept how you are feeling, the distress goes down, and the window of tolerance starts to open. Say, for instance, you feel anxious. It is about being okay even with those distressing feelings.”

3) Create a healthy stress management toolkit

Shah points out that healing is all about being able to access the tools that can help them feel better. “For some people, it is about helping them learn the tools to feel whatever they are feeling without getting dysregulated. Sometimes that is what is most important for that individual,” Shah adds. Whether you need to indulge in creative activities to feel better, to meditate or simply spend some quiet time, you should be able to access the toolkit that is the secret to your re-energising yourself.

4) Take care of your own needs first

Even if you are feeling overextended, it is important to take care of your needs first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. So take care of your health, say no when you have to, and prioritise yourself.

5) Ask for support

You don’t have to do it all by yourself. Distribute your responsibilities between your family members, say your siblings and your spouse. If you don’t have that opportunity, try seeking professional help to assist you in tasks.

Also Read: Financial Tips For Gen S Moms With Young Children And Ageing Parents